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Lynn Messer’s Memorial Cancelled

UPDATE: THE MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR LYNN MESSER HAS BEEN CANCELLED.

I THANK THE CHURCH FOR DOING THE RIGHT THING.

I’VE BEEN GIVEN MULTIPLE REASONS FOR THE CANCELLATION: THE PASTOR AND DEACONS ARE NOT PLEASED WITH KERRY’S ONGOING BEHAVIOR, KERRY’S DIFFERENT ACCOUNTS OF ALREADY REPORTED INVESTIGATIVE INFORMATION, SAFETY CONCERNS, POSSIBLE PROTESTS, CHURCH MEMBER’S CONCERNS ABOUT KERRY’S RELATIONSHIP WITH SPRING THOMAS.

I APPRECIATE THIS READER’S WORDS WHICH THEY INCLUDED IN A LETTER TO THE CHURCH THIS WEEK, “I cannot understand why you would choose to be more conduit to Kerry’s deception as the “grieving” spouse on Sunday.”

THIS LETTER BY J. LEE GAVE BIBLICAL PRECEDENCE FOR CANCELLING THE SERVICE: ZECHARIAH 7…CLICK HERE FOR LETTER

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A letter to Lynn Messer’s church

Dear First Baptist Church Festus/Crystal City,

Friends of Lynn’s family have not been successful in their attempt to speak with your pastor, or a member of the church staff. The pastor was either on the other line, not in the office, or no one answered the phone and it went straight to voicemail; many attempts.

We’re sure your intent was not to add more hurt and stress to Lynn’s sons and extended family, but this is what’s happening. Please help all of us understand why you continue to assist Kerry Messer and gravitate toward his side of the story instead of the son’s and law enforcement’s side of the story?

We’ve been contacted by multiple people who report they have attempted to talk to the pastor about all of this, but the facts have been minimized, Kerry’s reasoning justified, and some people say they have received no answers/returned phone calls.

This is from Kerry’s Find Lynn Messer Facebook page:

“Sunshine Mission:  This is Ma’s ministry of choice for people struggling with a variety of needs. During Ma’s years of cultivating her truck garden, she would take bushels of produce to Sunshine Mission. Because of its location and distance, she would usually get there after dark, or just before. So I encouraged her to take along one of her dogs. Thanks to Ma’s fearless confidence, nothing could stop her from doing anything she set her mind or heart to do. I expect to eventually donate most of Ma’s personal items myself.”

Kerry has on multiple occasions mentioned his counsel who helps him make decisions. We hope his counsel tells him how important it is for his sons to receive items that belonged to their mom, and for the grandchildren, daughter-in-law, mom, and sisters to receive something that belonged to Lynn.

Kerry clearly relies on his pastor as part of his circle of counselors. As a man of God, we; friends of Lynn and her children call on him to stand up for what is right and good. Abram and Aarron have gone to him to explain their dad’s pattern of deception, and with concerns about the relationship Kerry has with Spring Thomas – a relationship that was discovered by law enforcement just weeks following Lynn’s disappearance.  These young men have endeavored to do the decent and godly thing by approaching the pastor directly.

In the past week, it has come to light that the pastor has assisted Kerry in planning a memorial service for Lynn on August 20.

He choose to meet with Kerry, plan the service with Kerry, picked the date with Kerry and we are told Pastor McClain plans to speak at the service on behalf of those who love Lynn.  Were any of Lynn’s family members called?

It is reported that when the pastor encounters Abram and Elizabeth Messer around town, he refuses to speak to them. It is time for this to stop. Break free from whatever imagined power you may see Kerry as having.  His actions should tell you what needs to be done. While we still await more answers surrounding what happened to Lynn, it is evident that Kerry has not been truthful with his sons, with his church or with law enforcement. He is not acting in an upright manner.  It is time for you to call him to repentance and stand between evil and the innocent.

This is not a family feud. This is right and wrong.  We implore you to stand on the side of righteousness.

            Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; for the LORD knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish. (Psalms 1:1-6)

Why is FBC-FCC allowing itself to listen to the counsel of a man who has not been cleared in the investigation into his wife’s death and who by his own admittance was in a relationship with a woman, not his wife, within weeks of his wife’s disappearance?

Please urge Kerry to do the right things.  First and foremost, to tell what he knows about Lynn’s death. Secondly to come clean about his relationship with Spring.  Next to put an end to hurting his sons further by giving away their mother’s belongings to non-family members until they’ve been given the courtesy to look through her belongings. Spring Thomas is at his house helping Kerry do this according to the source. It looks like Kerry is disposing of and giving away Lynn’s belongings and Spring is taking part in it. It is time for FBC – Festus Crystal City to rise to the level of a New Testament Church.

Is this Kerry’s retribution for his sons telling a fraction of what they know about the investigation, and the circumstances surrounding it?

Is this Kerry preparing the house for Spring Thomas’ to move in soon? Is he preparing for marriage so there will be no chance of them having to testify against each other in court; should that day arrive, and many think that day is right around the corner.

Is Spring thinking through what this is doing to innocent grandchildren? To Kerry’s sons? Spring has told sources that she wants healing to take place between Kerry and his sons; as if healing is possible while Kerry continues to act in hurtful ways toward his sons with Spring’s help.

John 13:35 says “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Is Kerry Messer showing love for anyone other than himself?  He has completely cut off his children, grandchildren and in-laws.

            “If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.” (1 John 1:6-7)

Please put an end to First Baptist Festus Crystal City’s part in harming Abram and Aarron Messer and cooperating with Kerry’s treatment of them.

Why is FBC-FCC having fellowship with someone who has a pattern of walking in darkness (talking a good talk, but telling a different story with his walk)?

Dear Church, you have biblical grounds to excommunicate this man from your fellowship based solely on the way he treats his sons, daughter-in-law, and grandchildren.

 

I, Carolyn, did hear from a member of First Baptist Church Festus/Crystal City last week. Here are some excerpts from the correspondence:

“As soon as Kerry’s relationship with Spring was confirmed, Kerry was removed from his positions as deacon and Sunday school teacher. He was told that he was not allowed to have any roles in the church, only being allowed to attend services. He has no influence whatsoever. I can understand the frustration of the sons to feel like church leadership didn’t go far enough with their discipline. Banning Kerry from the church and announcing his allegations in front of the congregation isn’t the most logical way to handle the situation.”

Then will someone please tell me why God included in his Holy scriptures the precedence for removing people from the fellowship when unconfessed and unrepentant sin is involved?

Does church leadership understand that children, young adults, and abusive husbands are all watching and getting the message that the church doesn’t believe marriage vows and biblical mandates to deal with sin are as sacred as our Lord intended them?

 I believe that the pastor shares the same hope that I do that someday Kerry will feel true conviction and repent for what he’s done. The pastor just doesn’t feel like removing him from the church completely is the right thing to do. The hope is that Kerry will feel true conviction and decide to come clean and repent.”

If this were the case; waiting for the person to feel true conviction; God would not have included scriptures for how to correctly administer church discipline.

The family’s understanding is that the church did not make the above actions known to the church membership, but instead did it quietly.

Months ago, Abram and Aarron privately went to Pastor McClain after unsuccessfully confronting their father in May 2015 about his pattern of deception and his extramarital relationship. Pastor McClain has refused to help.  Abram & Aarron have explained to Pastor McClain that their father has persistently not told the truth to them or to the readers of the Find Lynn Messer page or to the local congregation at First Baptist Church Festus-Crystal City. They have explained that Kerry was already in an extramarital relationship with Spring Thomas just six weeks after Lynn disappeared – a relationship he rationalized to detectives as being necessary because he was use to having sex several times per week.  Pastor McClain should by now know that Kerry and Spring are not cooperating with the investigation. Also, that Abram and Aarron have begged their dad to come clean and come to repentance. It appears Pastor McClain continues to provide support and guidance to Kerry Messer. The Missouri Baptist Convention has separated from Kerry Messer. Samaritan Ministries has separated from Kerry Messer.  Even Families for Home Education (FHE) after considerable deliberation has finally separated from Kerry Messer. We would like to know, why is First Baptist Church Festus-Crystal City continuing to act on Kerry Messer’s behalf in what looks like, and family believes is, his continued deception?

Let’s pray that your pastor does the right thing.  We call on him to cancel the service on August 20 and refuse to participate in Kerry’s plans.  We can understand that he may want to have a service for Lynn’s friends, but allow us to remind you that they were invited to Lynn’s memorial service held in December 2016. We call on your pastor to go to Kerry and make an attempt at calling him to repentance.  We call on Pastor McClain to stand up for Abram and Aarron Messer and their families as Kerry gives away precious, irreplaceable belongings of their mom.  If your pastor does not act, then the church must.  Now is the time for action.

Please contact the church and encourage them to stand strong and take action:

charles@fbcfcc.org
firstbaptist@fbcfcc.org
Thank you for your time,
Friends of Lynn Messer

*This case is of public interest. Kerry Messer is a public figure who fund raises from the citizens of Missouri to provide professional and personal finances through his organization  Missouri Family Network.  Lynn Messer’s sons and extended family continue to point out moral and ethical issues they have witnessed by Kerry Messer. I do not write these posts or publish letters as a professional in any field of expertise, but rather to educate my readers from the life experiences through which I have lived. See the disclaimer in the side margin.

Click link ‘LYNN MESSER’ in margin for more articles.

#JusticeForLynn fundraiser: YouCaring

Status

Who retains Kerry Messer? Here’s the list

Blind to sinBetween July 2016 and present day I have posted approximately forty articles about the disappearance and discovery of Lynn Messer. I have interviewed Lynn’s son Abram Messer multiple times and have been given permission to post personal letters written by her son Aarron Messer. I have spoken with some of Lynn’s extended family members, friends whom she attended church with, and in whom she confided personal details about her life. All their stories have common threads; showing a tapestry of Lynn’s history that doesn’t resemble anything Kerry Messer writes on his Find Lynn Messer Facebook page.
See/click these links/paragraphs for Kerry Messer’s own words:
“For the first time in 39 years I kissed someone other than my wife, Lynn. If you want to call that an affair, then you call it that term. But this is not an affair,” Messer said in an interview. “This is a very cautious relationship that’s in a holding pattern while we wait to find out about Lynn. I’m a married man.” 
In an interview last week, Kerry Messer said his relationship with Thomas began around Christmas 2014 — about five months after his wife disappeared.

But Schott, of the Sheriff’s Department, said detectives had confirmed a relationship between Kerry Messer and Thomas months earlier — about eight weeks after Lynn Messer disappeared.

Messer said in an interview that he disclosed the relationship to police voluntarily and upon advice from pastors.

However, police say Messer first told them about Thomas only after authorities already had learned of the relationship from her, while visiting her farm. Hours later, police say, Messer called them to disclose the relationship.

Schott said Thomas was seen by police among search parties organized soon after Lynn’s disappearance. Police said she has refused further questioning.
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I never received a reply from Families for Home Education after my second inquiry regarding them continuing to retain Kerry Messer as their state lobbyist. Likewise, other people I know who wrote them letters and emails didn’t receive any type of courtesy reply.

I learned during this process that the executive directors for the FHE board are Al and Sheryl Schmidt and that Sheryl is the one who has significant input as to if FHE continues, or doesn’t continue, to retain Kerry Messer.  I placed a phone call and  Mrs. Schmidt (Sheryl) answered the phone. I explained who I was and that I was calling to find out if FHE had decided if they were going to continue retaining Kerry Messer, call a meeting to discuss it, or end their relationship with him. Sheryl put me on hold, picked back up after a lengthy wait and said, “Carolyn,” and then had her husband take over without telling me. I figured I was being put on hold for that purpose and possibly for the conversation to be recorded. I was fine with that but it made me wonder why they have, according to Al, registered Sheryl as a state lobbyist for FHE if she wasn’t comfortable taking a call from me and answering questions. I explained myself again and informed Al I was calling to verify that FHE still retains Kerry as their lobbyist, as is on record with the state capitol. Mr. Schmidt retorted that FHE is not going to base their decisions on opinions being played out on internet, TV and in the newspapers. They have instead chosen to weigh the character of a man they have known for 25 years and who has done an outstanding job representing and protecting homeschoolers and family values. He insisted my sources are not telling me the truth and repeatedly advised me, “We are all sinners, Carolyn and we need to forgive. We must remember balance and forgiveness.” 

I was told by Mr. Schmidt the sheriff does not support what I’m saying about Kerry having a relationship with another woman.  I’m grateful Mr. Schmidt was honest about FHE’s opinions.

The following is what I attempted to tell him, but I was interrupted with several, “We are all sinners. We need to forgive, Carolyn” comments. I reminded him that when unconfessed sin is involved it is our duty to hold our brother accountable. And although I wasn’t saying Kerry had committed a crime, if it turns out a crime was committed, then we need to allow the law, a tool God gave us for the protection of the innocent and for justice, to do its job. He insisted we need to forgive. I tried to remind him forgiveness has its place, but it’s separate from consequences, accountability, and justice. I don’t recall if I was able to finish the entire sentence.

I hope this makes it all the easier for FHE members to withhold paying next year’s membership dues. In my opinion, it’s time to find a new group to lead the state of Missouri in protecting homeschool freedoms and safe guarding our reputation.  I sent FHE direct quotes from Kerry that were published in the newspaper regarding the other woman, published by his sons about what Kerry told investigators about his sexual needs, and newpaper publications about Kerry kissing the other woman who was not his wife; an ongoing relationship of 2+ years. Al Schmidt said they have known Kerry for over 25 years and they must balance what they personally know about this man against unproven allegations.

Direct quotes printed in the newspaper and stated by law enforcement are not allegations. Direct quotes from Kerry Messer’s own mouth are not allegations.

How do Mr. and Mrs. Schmidt think Aarron and Abram Messer feel? They’ve known their dad longer and it’s been an impossible road with unbelievable findings for them to wrap their hearts and minds around!

Here is Al and Sheryl Schmidt’s FHE phone number. I encourage FHE members to call and tell FHE they will no longer support their efforts for the homeschooling community by no longer financially supporting their organization.  (417) 859-79028 or (877) 696-6343 ext. 62. I used the 417 number.

“Institutional betrayal has increasingly become the focus of awareness among survivors of many different forms of trauma. The common theme is the profound breach of trust that occurs when those in positions of authority, by their acts of omission and commission, effectively take the side of the perpetrators in their midst. In these instances, the more the integrity of the institution is compromised, the more it appears that officials will seek to cover up the problem in order to protect the institution’s reputation rather than aiding the victims of abuse.”

Trauma and Recovery, by Judith Herman

 

A deceased homeschool mom named Lynn Messer deserves our fight for her justice. Her adult, homeschooled sons are victims living through an unimaginable nightmare; waiting to find our how their mom died and if their dad is going to be arrested for involvement.

For the record, I cogitated on Mr. Schmidt’s accusation that my sources were wrong and that the sheriff doesn’t support what I’m saying about Kerry. I did after all reference direct quotes and links from the St. Louis Post Dispatch and Major Jason Schott. I included these quotes in previous letters to homeschool groups and families, and to FHE leadership.

I spoke with Major Jason Schott of the Ste. Genevieve County Sheriff’s Department yesterday,  April 5, 2017, and he confirmed the accuracy of the quotes that were published in the newspaper. He repeated the information they have gleaned from the investigation. Investigators confirmed in early November 2014 during their questioning of Spring Thomas that her relationship with Kerry Messer had moved beyond friendship. Spring stated that the relationship began 8 weeks after Lynn disappeared. Although Kerry told a reporter that he disclosed the relationship voluntarily to the authorities he did so after investigators talked to Spring Thomas about the more than friendship, relationship. Kerry called the sheriff hours later to disclose the relationship.

Major Schott confirmed that the St. Louis Post Dispatch article, Missing woman case tears apart Jefferson City lobbying team, which I referenced for several quotes, was true and accurate.

From what I can gather Al Schmidt possibly spoke falsely to me, or did Kerry Messer lie to FHE about true information in news articles and the Investigation Discover Channel show: Disappeared, and Mr. Schmidt was repeating what he had been told?  I highly encourage FHE leadership to call Major Jason Schott to confirm this for yourself; (573) 883-5820.

I have deep concerns about Kerry Messer’s possible involvement in his wife’s disappearance and I believe he needs to be removed from his position as state lobbyist for various organizations if for no other reason than his involvement with Spring Thomas, not his wife, since shortly after Lynn’s disappearance. I understand there has not been an arrest, and I know he is presumed innocent. That doesn’t mean, we as Christians can’t hold him accountable for going against scripture; as testified to by Kerry’s own comments regarding his participation in an extra marital relationship for over two years. 

This disqualifies Kerry Messer from serving the Christian community in a leadership capacity. Attempting to merge Kerry’s stories on his Find Lynn Messer Facbeook page with his media quotes about is girlfriend paints a picture of a duplicitous personality who does not serve my interest in family values or homeschooling issues.

I am asking my readers to call the leaders of Families for Home Education and inform them that since they refuse to do anything about Kerry lobbying for our group that you will no longer consider paying dues to their organization; during the interim we will count on HSLDA to care for our needs and notify us of issues for which we need to contact state reps. Kerry Messer no longer represents our values and he cannot speak for or protect our interests and concerns. At worst he not been cleared of the investigation surrounding his wife’s death and at the least, he was having an affair with a woman not his wife for over two years.  St. Louis Post Dispatch: Missing woman case tears apart Jefferson City lobbying team.

We renounce Kerry’s leadership in any aspect of representation for the great state of Missouri, and we now renounce FHE’s leadership for their lack of biblical accountability dealing with Kerry’s inconsistencies and extra marital relationship.

I am asking my readers to also call Alliance for Life, Americans United for Life, Missouri Association of Christian Child Care Agencies, Inc., Missourians for Personal Safety, and Samaritan Ministries International. The goal is Kerry Messer being removed from his position of state lobbyist for these various organizations. All phone numbers are listed below.

FHE Leadership Board: Look at the map to see in which region you live. 

Region 1: Erin and Charyti Jackson (660) 582-5903                    FHE Region map 2 updated 5-5-16

Region 2: Vacant—leave a voicemail: (877) 696-6343

Region 3: Bill and Cyretta Holbrook (877) 696-6343 ext. 3

Mark & Tacey Brewster (816) 524-1887

Region 4: Dan and Mavis Dey (573) 239-3785

Region 5: Vacant—call: (877) 696-6343

Region 6W: Vacant—call Al and Sheryl Schmidt (417) 859-7908; 1-877-696-6343 ext. 62

Region 6E: Al and Sheryl Schmidt (417) 859-7908; 1-877-696-6343 ext. 62

Region 7: Vacant—call Al and Sheryl Schmidt (417) 859-7908; 1-877-696-6343 ext. 62

 

Below is the current list of Kerry’s lobby principals obtainable from the state capitol. If you have ties to any group you may contact them and voice your concerns, withdraw your membership, or not pay your next membership dues until the problem is resolved.

The Missouri Southern Baptist Convention no longer retains Kerry.  I called them to verify that Kerry is no longer a lobbyist for them. I spoke with Don Hinkle.  He was soft-spoken and wanted to make sure I understood that the only reason Kerry is no longer the lobbyist is because his contract expired and wasn’t renewed due to budget cuts…although Kerry isn’t being paid to lobby for the Southern Baptist Convention, Kerry will always advocate for family values at the state capital. I was hoping for at least, “We have concerns due to the investigation and chose not to renew…or something of the sort. I have been told my Lynn’s family members that they have heard three different explanations. If you want to inquire as to how many other staff lost their jobs due to budget cuts you may call MBC Executive Director, Dr. Yeats (573) 636-0400.
ALLIANCE FOR LIFE Still has Kerry listed as a lobbyist but mainly works with Sam Lee.
P.O. BOX 241
LEE’S SUMMIT MO 64063
417-598-1040
AMERICANS UNITED FOR LIFE—Dropped my call
310 S. PEORIA ST., S-500
CHICAGO IL 60670
312-492-7234
FAMILIES FOR HOME EDUCATION—Contacts listed above

MACCCA – MISSOURI ASSOCIATION OF CHRISTIAN CHILD CARE AGENCIES, INC.—As of last contact Kerry still works for them. They knew his wife was missing but didn’t know her remains had been found.
24302 MAHIN ROAD
LAMONTE MO 65337
660-347-5982
MISSOURIANS FOR PERSONAL SAFETY (gun safety)—I spoke with Kevin Jamison. Yes, Kerry represents them. They have been pleased with how Kerry has been very honest, upfront, and forthright with updates on everything. Kerry informed them when Lynn went missing, Kerry told them about his relationship with the another woman, told them when Lynn’s remains were found, and informed them when he, Kerry, secured Lynn’s dental records for the authorities; and just in time because they were about to be destroyed. Mr. Jamison said everybody but Kerry (referring to his colleagues, knew Kerry’s wife was dead and wouldn’t be returning). 
2614 NE 56TH TER.
GLADSTONE MO 64119-2311
816-455-2669
SAMARITAN MINISTRIES INTERNATIONAL—Samaritan Ministries members are a group of believers that have come together in Biblical community to help bear one another’s medical burdens without the use of health insurance.I explained that I was calling to verify information on record with the Missouri State Capital which lists Kerry Messer as Samaritan’s state lobbyist. He fiddled with his computer, put me on hold, dropped my call, and didn’t return my call. 
P.O. BOX 389
WASHINGTON IL 61571
309-382-3600
MISSOURI BAPTIST CONVENTION, CHRISTIAN LIFE COMMISSION (recently deleted Kerry’s name from their paperwork)
400 EAST HIGH STREET
JEFFERSON CITY MO 65101
(573) 635-7931

Click link ‘LYNN MESSER’ in margin for more articles.

 

 

 

 

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Lynn Messer: More Answers

Read the updated Wiki page before it is altered: Death of Lynn Messer. It currently has details not yet reported in the media. I was sent a copy of the original update so if the Wiki page becomes altered, I will post the unaltered version on my blog.

“Kerry has challenged anyone with knowledge of his past suggested infidelity come forward. However because of his political influence many are afraid to do so publicly. Anyone with information is urged to contact the Ste Genevieve Sheriffs Office.”¹

Thank you for you interest in this case. Thank you for keeping Lynn’s memory and story alive. Let’s agree in prayer for truth to be found and justice to be served.

 

UPDATE: Around 10:40 p.m. on November 17, 2016 the Wikipedia link was edited. It now reflects an abbreviated version of the disappearance of Lynn Messer. The details written by one of Lynn’s sons is no longer available on the link. My understanding is that the police have given the sons authority to discuss many details of the case. This leads me to question if one of the moderators of the “Death of Lynn Messer” Wiki page does not want those details printed in a public forum since changing the content can drastically change the perspective.

 

I was provided this link for viewing the differences in the son’s version and the newly edited version.  You may copy and paste this link in your web browser:  https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Death_of_Lynn_Messer&diff=750172149&oldid=750157785

 

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¹Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Lynn_Messer

Status

Kerry Messer Not Cooperating; Family History

I reached out to the Messer brothers last weekend through social media and explained to them who I am, why I blog, what my background is, and that I wrote a blog post about their mom’s disappearance.

I told them if they wanted to share anything with my readers I would be honored to listen, and to be a voice for their mom.  I assured them that I understood if they didn’t have the time, energy, or interest to schedule this in their lives right now.

They both kindly replied.

Today I will share a portion of Abram Messer’s reply, “I’ve been thinking about reaching out to you to not only thank you for your piece, but to see if you would be interested in talking to me. One of the many issues that I struggle with having grown up in a home where destructive ideology  was normal is my desire to break, (I pray permanently) the sin cycle and demonstrate a Biblical example for my children to see. I would love to share more of our story with you. Thank you for following the prompting of the Holy Spirit to reach out to me.”

According to Abram Messer, and confirmed with the Ste Genevieve County Sheriff’s Office, Kerry Messer, is no longer cooperating with the investigation and hasn’t been for almost a year.  And with this, I can tell you that Abram has been doing what no child, no matter what age, could ever imagine having to do. He has been assisting in an investigation that revolves around his dad, due to the disappearance of his mom.

During my conversation with Abram, he conveyed his appreciation and trust in the Ste Genevieve County Sheriff’s Office. He explained they have, and continue to do, a terrific job. He equally included the hours upon hours of interviews over the days, months and last two years they conducted with him. Abram mentioned how investigators stepped inside his head and pulled out information he wouldn’t have thought of on his own. He reflected that if the authorities need another 9 hour interview from his head he will give it every day. Abram has complete faith in their ability because they want to come to the truth. So if you have heard by word of mouth, or read in other news outlets, that the investigators aren’t doing their job it simply isn’t true.

*Disclaimer: There have been no arrests made in the disappearance of Lynn Messer. Kerry Messer remains innocent of any charges. I am not claiming anyone is mentally ill or guilty; but simply pointing out concerns.

I will walk you through a bit of Messer family history according to, Lynn and Kerry’s son, Abram. While talking to Abram, I could have literally finished some of his sentences for him because I understand what he lived through growing up and I understand some of the mind-set I hear and read about his father.

I’ve often wondered why people are easily hoodwinked by the possibility of dual personality individuals. I wonder if it’s from having a good heart that’s always looking for the best in people; because who goes around looking for evil.  We tend to believe what we see. If we were at the theatre watching a play we would expect to see grand acting, but we don’t anticipate seeing it in the office, at church, at school, at the store, or standing in the driveway talking to a neighbor.

If you think it was easy for Abram to recall this history, I can tell you it wasn’t. There were a few times I thought our phone call had disconnected, but no, he

Abram Messer 1

Photo Credit: J.B. Forbes, St. Louis Post Dispatch

was distraught and needed time to process what he wanted to say. He loves his mom. He loves his dad.  He wants to help other families, other women, and other victimizers recognize abuse before it’s too late. He speculated that recent events have changed how he views his relationship with his wife and children. He believes human nature will do one of two things.

  1. Repeat the Cycle

  2. Go to the opposite extreme

We both agreed that there is a better option. Stop holding any person to a standard you want to achieve, or a low you want to avoid. Our standard is Jesus. If His heart, mind, way and will is what we chase after we will always be progressing in a good and healthy direction.

Survivors, and witnesses, share their stories because it could be the key that leads to freedom for other victims. Abram was clear on his objectives for speaking out about his family life and his mom’s disappearance. You can read, LYNN MESSER: 3 OBJECTIVES, by clicking here.

Abram believed for a long time his father lived two lives. Kerry seemed different at home than he was at church or anywhere else. Out of curiosity I asked, “How old were you when you came to this realization?”

Abram didn’t have to think about the answer, he knew it, “Between 10 and 12 years old.”

I asked because 10-12 seems to be a common age when children become aware of abusive or mentally unstable parents. Children often wonder if something is wrong sooner, but that tends to be the age when they know, and can understand it and verbalize it.

Abram conveyed that he grew up having a dread of daddy coming home from work; just knowing he would come home from work caused anxiety because he knew dad only cared about work. When at friends’ homes he envied the kids’ excitement when their daddy arrived home from work. They would excitedly run to the window waiting for their father to walk through the door to great them.

The term, “Ma” that Kerry uses in his Facebook posts on the, “Find Lynn Messer” page originated when the boys were around 14-15 years old. The term came from the Ma and Pa Kettle films. Lynn never liked the term, and requested that Kerry not use it but he chose not to respect her wish.  Abram didn’t use the term; to his knowledge only Kerry used it.

90% of the food they consumed was grown and processed on their farm. Lynn had a one acre garden that kept her busy and productive, and it may have served as a coping mechanism to occupy herself. She stayed busy.

While we are talking about staying busy; a point that has stuck in many minds is how dependable Lynn was for commitments she made; such as VBS (Vacation Bible School). Lynn spent months preparing for the church VBS program every year. On Monday, July 7, 2014, Lynn went to Wal-Mart and purchased supplies for the Tuesday VBS program. She was prepared. She was excited. She was scheduled to participate the next day; Tuesday, July 8, 2014, but Lynn was a no-show to VBS.

Kerry reportedly hid financial records from Lynn and refused to write balances in checkbooks leaving Lynn to constantly fret over finances.

In 1984 Kerry began working for Missouri Family Network as a lobbyist for pro-life, family and homeschool causes. M.F.N. was one of a few small organizations that worked across the gamut on these issues. Kerry has quietly encouraged M.F.N. supporters to write the checks in his name, Kerry Messer.  I’ve talked to other individuals who remember this as well.

Abram told about his dad’s decision to drive older used vehicles. There came a time about three years ago when a married couple from their church became burdened for Kerry because he didn’t have a dependable car to drive back and forth to Jefferson City. This sweet and caring couple went to friends and quietly fundraised. They happily sacrificed, knowing the Messers didn’t have money for another vehicle, and bought Lynn and Kerry a new car that would be dependable for work and family life. Weren’t they wonderful friends? Yes! But guess what? According to Abram, his dad didn’t want to drive the new car, especially not to Jefferson City, because donators wouldn’t want to give financial gifts to him if they thought he had enough money to purchase such a nice looking new car. Thus, his decision to stick with older models that looked the part of poor, financially needy lobbyist. I wondered what became of the car. Abram said his mom was in an accident with that car and it was totaled.

A man who couldn’t afford a dependable car and yet has accumulated a reported two and a half million dollars in assets while managing to keep it completely hidden from his wife.

Abram mentioned overriding character questions he had about his dad.

  • It seemed there was one way to do everything; and it was his dad’s way?

  • Took an excessively long time deciding how to complete tasks with perfection being the goal; making it difficult to begin the task?

  • Didn’t like to involve others in completing projects or work tasks?

  • Money was hidden and hoarded?

  • Had a deep need to control everything and everyone around him?

  • Had a deep and twisted belief that husbands are to dominate their wives?

  • Dishonest, fraudulent, duplicitous personality. Changed according to his audience?

  • Took advantage of others to get what he wanted?

  • Lacked empathy; was willing to lie about his own kids to save himself?

  • Craved admiration; read the, “Find Lynn Messer” FB page?

  • Fabricated stories and fantasies of ideal love to attract attention, read the, “Find Lynn Messer” FB page?

  • Life was about him?

  • Didn’t bond with people?

Abram revealed that Lynn did suffer physical abuse at the hands of his father. Although Kerry took the time on the 11/22/2014 Facebook post to expand on his beliefs of women not violating the secrecy of marriage; specifically of his, “Bride” being wise to guard herself on what she shares about her husband with other women. She wisely did just the opposite! Kerry went on to post, “There are things husbands and wives know that no one should ever be told. The home is a place where virtually every social taboo no longer applies. The home is where we all get to relax and drop all our guards (and dog gone it, everyone has gas – get over it). But you still don’t talk about many things in ways that violate your mate. And the list of such topics can get long. A little discretion affirms a lot of love!”

Thankfully, Lynn, had shared with some women about the abuse she suffered in the home; abuse from Kerry, because social taboos are wrong for a reason. These women have reportedly fully cooperated with investigators and presented the truth that Lynn has not been able to offer in person.

I often say, if a woman is strong enough to stay; she is strong enough to leave.

Did Lynn finally realize her husband was not capable of change and decided to adjust her life? Did she fail to realize he was willing to keep toxic control with any means necessary?

 

If you believe your life may be in jeopardy; please listen to me as I gently, but firmly, tell you, “Leave immediately.” Go to the authorities. Go to Domestic Violence. Go to your pastor or a counselor. Document the abuse in every way possible. See: It is Real You are Write.  If you plan on confronting your abuser about his toxic ways it is best to do it in the company of a witness or witnesses. See Toxic Intervention. Scroll down the left margin of this blog for, “Articles: Other Sources” and “Solutions-Hotlines-Help.”

 

I will leave you with this quote from Abram,

“To know in the middle, of not knowing what happened, that God did not wake up the morning of July 8, 2014, and say, ‘Wow, I didn’t see this coming!’ I know he will use all this to our benefit; to affect us, to change us, to mold us…there is some solace to that.”

This will be a series of posts with the final entry being the cry of Abram’s heart. In the middle of living a nightmare he says, “This whole ugly mess will get darker before it gets better.”

 

If you would like an idea of how a duplicitous personality can hoodwink supporters you may read more here: I am Known as a Liar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Status

Correction

In my last post, Appeal: Conviction Upheld, I stated that I would begin publishing articles I wrote during the time of the criminal trial.

My statement was premature since the convicted felon has other cases pending against him.

Correction

For the sake of the innocent I will, at this time, refrain from posting articles surrounding the original investigation, trial and conviction.

Thank you for understanding.

Status

Appeal: Conviction Upheld!

P R A Y E R acronym

Now that I have composed myself and can see through my tear filled eyes I want to give you an update on a court case you, my GiveMe Chocolate readers, prayed for on multiple occasions two years ago.

Last month the Kansas Court of Appeals heard the case regarding my former husband who was convicted for sex crimes against children. If I understood correctly he appealed on the grounds that there was a serious error of law, or that the evidence did not support the verdict in his criminal trial.

On March 15, 2016 his appeal was heard before the Kansas Appellate Court. I was told it could take 3-6 months for the opinion to come back; perhaps longer, but the judgment came in much earlier; April 22, 2016.

I’ve always been confident of the answer God gave me years ago regarding the finality of the arrest and pending conviction. Yet, I have to admit I think my faith skipped a beat when I saw my email inbox today with the memo: “Butler case,” because I literally gasped and felt sick to my stomach at the same time. Then I reminded myself that it was a done deal and opened the email from the Victim/Witness Coordinator.

 

 

On April 22nd, the Kansas Court of Appeals affirmed the convictions.

 

Then the big, heavy duty, steaming hot, grateful heart, broken heart—for the little children, thankful sobs fell like a thunderstorm. My poor boys felt helpless as they watched and heard their mom bawl. I had to tell them I was fine, that my tears were happy tears on top of years of sad tears as I repeated at least ten times, “Thank you, God.”

I’m still crying grateful tears. So if you see me this week and I randomly start crying; I’m okay. I’m grateful.

Now that the appeals process is over I can publicly publish my writings from the time of the trail. I will release one a day for the next few days, starting tomorrow.

Between the time of the conviction and the time of the appeal the defendant managed to commit two crimes while in prison; one of which was a felony.

 

 

Status

P.R.A.Y.E.R. for Innocent Children

P R A Y E R acronym

This is a post from two years ago that is fresh on my mind today. So I share…please join me in praying for the continued safety of innocent children.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

I may not be able to keep all child molesters off the street or pray specifically for all children who have suffered childhood victimization, but I can make a difference in four lives that I know of; possibly untold numbers of others.

So I pray.

Sixteen years ago I had concerns about a specific person’s behaviors and fourteen years ago the suspicions were confirmed. I have prayed fourteen years for God’s hand to bring safety and justice. Waiting on God’s sovereignty has been one of the most difficult faith walks of my life. Scripture, prayer and my daily relationship the Lord have been at times the only glue holding my sanity together.

I have wanted to shout from the roof tops and mountain tops what I know is true about this person, or point people in the direction of legal and professional documentation regarding this person, but a judge in a court of law made it clear I was not to keep this clergy member from attaining and keeping gainful employment.

I pray this is the week of redemption, of ‘Vengence is mine’, says the Lord, of justice, of vindication, of “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” Matthew 18:6

I pray this is the beginning of needed healing for young victims, young victims the church did not believe. My heart weeps and breaks for them…

Always believe the children.

Let us together end the reign of a child victimizer.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Scriptures to pray:

Proverbs 14:16 – The wise fear the Lord and shun evil, but a fool is hotheaded and yet feels secure.

Proverbs 14:33 – Wisdom reposes in the heart of the discerning and even among fools she lets herself be known.

Proverbs 15:2 – The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.

Proverbs 15:14 – The discerning heart seeks knowledge,

Proverbs 16:22 – Prudence is a fountain of life to the prudent, but folly brings punishment to fools.

Proverbs 17:24 – A discerning person keeps wisdom in view

Psalm 75 (The Message)

We thank you, God, we thank you—
your Name is our favorite word;
your mighty works are all we talk about.

2-4 You say, “I’m calling this meeting to order,
I’m ready to set things right.
When the earth goes topsy-turvy
And nobody knows which end is up,
I nail it all down,
I put everything in place again.
I say to the smart alecks, ‘That’s enough,’
to the bullies, ‘Not so fast.’”

5-6 Don’t raise your fist against High God.
Don’t raise your voice against Rock of Ages.
He’s the One from east to west;
from desert to mountains, he’s the One.

7-8 God rules: he brings this one down to his knees,
pulls that one up on her feet.
God has a cup in his hand,
a bowl of wine, full to the brim.
He draws from it and pours;
it’s drained to the dregs.
Earth’s wicked ones drink it all,
drink it down to the last bitter drop!

9-10 And I’m telling the story of God Eternal,
singing the praises of Jacob’s God.
The fists of the wicked
are bloody stumps,
The arms of the righteous
are lofty green branches.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The lyrics in this video are applicable for boys and girls who have been victimized.