Toxic Tuesday: Lynn Messer Missing Person

Please understand, just because you know a couple doesn’t mean you know what goes on in their home. I know from experience.

To be clear; I do not know what went on in this family’s home.

A new article on the disappearance of Lynn Messer was published in the Sunday, St. Louis Post Dispatch. I will share my feelings and theories regarding this Christian, homeschool mom who has been missing for two years.Toxic Tuesday biochem hazard small

I have a different perspective than most of my friends, and homeschool community, on this subject.

Of course I’m coming from a background of living with a mentally disturbed man. A man who most people thought of as being godly, personable, funny, sincere, a dynamic speaker, a soul-winning preacher, a world traveling evangelist with a heart for hurting and needy children, a terrific communicator and writer. This was the side he wanted people to see. He lived his life on a stage; acting out the role he believed people wanted to see. Soaking in the accolades.

This is what I experienced living with this man. A dark, disturbed, dishonest, abusive, unfaithful, unbeknown to me: pedophile, controlling, woman hater who suffered from mental illness and a personality disorder. I never told people for years. Why? See: My Destructive Marriage. I left him when I believed it was probable that our daughter and I would not again wake up alive.

Now he’s in prison, but I imagine he is still a grand actor.

So what if I’m not the only woman who lived a life where no one would have ever guessed what my home life was like?

The letters I receive from readers tell me the problem is global. And I’m not talking about wide-spread in the secular, non-Christian arena. I’m telling you there are untold numbers of Christian women; including pastor’s wives and missionaries’ wives living in difficult, abusive marriages.

Because I read extensively on the subject of spousal abuse I can share that statistics report women who disappear under questionable circumstances are usually found dead; usually at the hands of their significant other and at the least, because of their significant other.

So when a local woman went missing two years ago my radar lit up. Of course the Christian community rallied around the man because they believed this wonderful man would never have a role in his wife’s disappearance. I hope they are correct. Their hearts went out to him when he was being questioned about his wife’s disappearance. Friends thought time was wasting and should be spent trying to find his beloved, “bride,” as he refers to her in his Facebook posts. He also refers to her as, “Ma.”

The husband’s writings reminded me too much of my former husband. Not fair, I’m sure, but I’m being honest about my gut feelings. The posts he wrote about his bride on Facebook were like reading ponderings, convincing arguments, and outright lies that my former husband would have written about me; to make people believe and understand how much he loved me, needed me, and could never go on without me.  Non-truths; in the case of my former husband. I don’t know Lynn’s husband; I’m just saying there are oddities in this case.

I have prayed numerous times for this missing woman.  I questioned if she was dead after reading the first few Facebook posts written about her.

Find Lynn Messer

Husband, Kerry Messer, Missouri State Lobbyist in Jefferson City. Photo credit: Find Lynn Messer Facebook page

Shortly after Lynn’s disappearance I received a financial support letter in the mail asking for local Christian, homeschooling families to send financial gifts to help the man, as a state lobbyist for the homeschooling community, during his time of difficulty. I tossed the letter in the trash and told my husband, “I’m not helping a man who I suspect holds guilt in the disappearance of his wife.”

I’m basing opinions off my background of studying a specific personality disorder. You see, people with narcissistic personality disorder, or tendencies toward it, have the same order of operations. What I read on Facebook reminded me of  narcissistic supply. Local friends and fellow Christians could have unknowingly been giving narcissistic supply. People were providing love, financial gifts, meals, written encouragement,  man-hours searching the 250 acre property for the wife, praise for the man’s character and marital devotion, prayers, and help around the farm. Maybe the support was correctly administered. I don’t know.

I’m not saying the man has been diagnosed with a personality disorder; I’m stating parallels I saw, which concerned me.

I figured that no one knew the hundreds of acres as well as him and, if a possibility existed that he was involved, he would know where the body was located.

Many women report living with abusive husbands. The following are a handful of ways some of the more subtle abuse happens: The man keeps her living like she’s dirt poor while he enjoys a higher social standing. She eats simple and cheap meals while he eats the finest of food. She wears the same old clothes for years or decades while he wears new clothes. He travels and goes on expensive trips while she stays home to keep the house. He enjoys friendships with other women away from the home while she is expected not to talk to men without her husband present.

I hear from women who live in defeat and depression while believing the lies their husbands tell them. Lies such as all his problems are her fault, she isn’t talented enough, doesn’t make enough money, isn’t pretty, is boring, isn’t a good mother, isn’t a good wife, should me more like a woman the husband holds in high esteem. So many women in these relationships live in despair. Many counselors don’t get it. The man seems so put-together at counseling sessions and many Christian counselors will not reprimand a man in the presence of the wife. Read more about problems with the false sense of male entitlement here. These women can end up suicidal when they fail to find understanding or help.

Couple with this a wife reconciling in her heart and mind a public man who boldly teaches the word of God and prays, with the private man who secretly treats his wife in the home with ridicule, resentment, the silent treatment, physical, emotional, psychological, and/or sexual abuse due to his addiction to pornography. This may leave a woman unable to grasp reality because she has been fed a constant stream of lies.

These women can’t give enough praise to make their man feel as special as he deems himself.  The man in return doesn’t have kind works of affirmation or appreciation for who she is, nor does he recognize anything of value she provides. See: To Live But Not Exist.

These women may feel like they are crazy, will never be able to please their man, are only making life worse, and would be better off dead.

If this was Lynn’s life I wish I could have talked to her. I would have embraced her, cried with her, prayed over her and told her, “It’s not your fault. Don’t believe it. You’re beautiful, capable, talented, sweet, fun, caring and needed. You are lovable.”  Lynn

I wonder what their kids know and think; opinions, facts or questions that haven’t made it to the media. They are grown adults and I can’t imagine how they have endured through these two years. They are who my heart goes out to; and the grandchildren.

My prayer is for closure to come to those who loved and valued, Ma.

As someone who had to learn to look for the thread of truth woven in a story or statement there were a few comments made on the Find Lynn Messer Facebook page, early in the investigation, that made me pause and wonder. These statements stood out to me and didn’t leave my memory. Maybe I have an over active imagination but I truly had to learn to read my ex-husband in this way to attempt to keep my daughter safe.

Located in a July 12, 2014, Facebook post:  “In closing: For those of you who know Lynn best – you understand when I say that she is the strongest work horse on our farm. And, for those of you who know me best – you understand from Luke 14:5 that I only paraphrase Jesus’ figurative teaching, when I say that the only reason I am not with you in worship this morning is because ‘my ox is in a ditch.'” I wondered if she was literally in a ditch or hole somewhere on the property! Where were the animals placed when they died?

Located in a July 12, 2015, Facebook post: “…to be honest, I am torn between two opposites. First is that I have to admit not being able to focus due to so many stresses, and the conviction to be transparent about it when I don’t want to be.” About what did he not want to be truthfully transparent; despite the conviction that he should be transparent?

Located in a July 12, 2015, Facebook post: “I am at a loss as to how to interact with our family members and even my own grandchildren.” Was there a sense of guilt keeping him from fully engaging and bonding with his precious family?

You may think this is sensationalism…but women who have survived abusive men know this is all in the realm of possibility. I pray the parallels are simply coincidental.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Top photo credit: Find Lynn Messer Facebook profile picture

Further reading on the disappearance of Lynn Messer:

St. Louis Post Dispatch, July 17, 2016,: Missing woman case tears apart Jefferson City lobbying team

Daily Journal July 8, 2016, Family Releases New Details

Facebook: Find Lynn Messer

The Missouri Times Messer Answers Questions Raised About Missing Wife

CBS St. Louis One Year Later


36 thoughts on “Toxic Tuesday: Lynn Messer Missing Person

  1. Joanie says:

    I have a sister who was in a very narcissistic marriage – when we found out we all scooped her out of there. Many people couldn’t believe we’d help her leave him but it was almost exactly as you described. Scary true

  2. Marie says:

    Thank you for the article. I too have had many doubts about his involvement however this man has always sent up red flags with me. Yes I knew Lynn, yes I knew things most church people didn’t know because those topics were “off limits” at church and if you didn’t conform you were shunned. I was an abused wife at one point in my life. Life with an abuser behind closed doors is a living hell. Lynn’s life was no bed of roses as her husband protests it was, she just never shared it openly. The county is a “good old boy” county so when you have political pull as he does folks tend to overlook what is right in front of their faces. This is a man who doesn’t mind parking in a handicapped spot at church blocking those who need it and when called to his attention would just say “I’m bad” leaving his car in the handicapped spot without having the legal right to do so. This may seem petty but for a man who professes to be “Godly” he doesn’t mind breaking the law. So what’s going to be his excuse when the truth comes out? What fools are his supporters going to look like when the truth comes out and he is put in jail? He is also an adulter, yes, his wife has not been proven dead and yet he carries on with another woman. Something that goes against all biblical teachings and the very organization he runs. Wake up people! You are allowing him to hide behind the church and the very teachings you profess to believe in. Is this justice for Lynn?
    Think about it: she would have NEVER walked away from her children, grandchildren or her commitment to teach VBS the next morning.

    • Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Unfortunately this isn’t the first time church members have taken the side of an abuser instead of the victim. It happens in many churches and it’s a sad state. People think they would know if someone were an abuser, but no, there are not necessarily telltale signs in their behavior. Abusers often hide behind social standing, kind deeds and stellar reputations. They can be charming with a charasmatic personlaity. To me…Lynn’s husband had glaring issues that spoke volumes in his Facebook posts alone. I imagine investigators have gleened much from his posts.

  3. Sounds Familiar says:

    Such a great post! I was married for 8 years to a man who has subsequently been professionally diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Bi-polar disorder. I, too, have been on high alert since this story broke. I think only those of us who have been there can see the signs. It’s very interesting that I hyper-focused on his phrase “my ox is in a ditch” as well. I wondered if I was just too paranoid, but there are multiple times – especially in the early going – that I wondered if he was speaking in some kind of code. I do think he is reasonably intelligent. Part of this could be gloating over how “it was all in front of their faces all the time and they didn’t catch on” — that would fit the bill. I was also very disturbed over his statements of butchering animals in their kitchen. I wondered if this, too, was a nod to what happened. Unless you have experienced this sort of person, you cannot imagine how someone can have two distinct realities. The man in the suit and tie on Sundays – perhaps teaching Sunday School and saying all the right things. The crazy man at home who lies, abuses and is not faithful. Before I had the strength to leave my abusive and adulterous husband, I would think about ways I could leave clues that it was him when he murdered me. Isn’t that so sad! I was a college-educated, professional woman who would have NEVER imagined that I would be in an abusive marriage. Yet, that is just how good some of these guys are. Read “The Sociopath Next Door” if you haven’t already. Praying that God reveals the truth here soon. Lynn’s family deserves answers. I’m so glad that they are speaking out. Their silence had been perplexing to me, but only confirmed what I suspected that Kerry was heavily controlling everyone’s moves!

    • My former husband’s doctors told me he had NPD, along with other issues. Those doctors told me to weigh everything he said and wrote to me as clues to what he was thinking or doing. I learned to journal everything and leave it with my counselor or my daughter’s child psychologist so if anything happened to us there would be evidence and my written concerns. I have read the ‘Sociopath Next Door,’ which is why Kerry’s Facebook posts highly concerned me. I can understand family members being controlled by Kerry. IF…he has NPD (which is an arm of being a sociopath) it is easy to be sucked into their twisted reality because of their ability to lie and manipulate any situation. They are the most brillantly convincing people and can make anything wrong sound rational and right. Something people can’t understand unles they’ve endured a narcissist.

    • We did as well. Sadly Lynn posted Psalm 55 to her Facebook as well as all her mysterious injuries, including a roll over car accident.

      The writer of this article and I have mirrored thoughts and we actually married these snakes.

      We as a group of Truth Seekers, spent more hours on Lynn Messer than we want to admit. “My ox is in a ditch” along with the entire first letter dispatched from Koolaid Kerry contains the most telling circumstantial evidence.

      Glad more are speaking out.

      • God bless you for the hours you spent on behalf of Lynn. I had no idea about other injuries and accidents. I’m glad Lynn had the wisdom to post about them. Someone did bring to my attention the possbility of Kerry’s brother also dying, by questionable suicide. I have not confirmed this. I hope investigators are going deep into history on this case. You mentioned, “Koolaid Kerry.” Are you aware that,narcisstic personalities are historically some of the most brutal world dictators and cult leaders? Again, I’m not saying he is mentally ill, but readers keep bringing up more clues about his personality and character.

      • I went and read Psalm 55. My heart sinks within me! I prayed that same chapter over my own life on several occasions…while in a toxic, abusive marriage while waiting on God. In hind sight, I know I waited to long for my former husband to heal and seek profesional help, and it looks like Lynn did too. God does not require us to stay in abusive marriages with a mean, unfaithful, foolish husband.

  4. Yvonne says:

    This story is disturbing on so many levels. I did not know Lynn or her family and have not really followed the story. But, just from what I am reading, snippets that you have posted, I can immediately tell he is in no way broken up about her disappearance. The ox in the ditch comment was particularly sickening to me, not so much because of the ditch part, but because he referred to his wife as “a work-horse on a farm” and “an ox.” Really?? That’s what you think of your wife, your companion, the mother of your children??? I have been in bad relationships, and thankfully was protected from marrying any of them. I am now in a healthy marriage where my husband loves me and cherishes me. He would never call me such demeaning and derogatory names. Also, the fact that this man feels the need to post his inner musings on Facebook??? And, if it is true that he is with another woman already, that’s the biggest red flag of all. I do pray for her to be found (at this point, it would have to be her body), so her children and friends can have closure. Too bad Unsolved Mysteries isn’t still on…i bet they could help uncover the truth.

    • Anonymous says:

      I thought the EXACT same things about the “Ox” & “the WORKHORSE of the farm”!!!!

      I’m SOO glad to see that those WORDS also caught other people’s attention!

      I agree, he’s well educated, he’s a good writer, he’s a FAKE, & he PROB gets a rise out of putting the clues right in front of everyone. It’s like he ENJOYS the DRAMA & obv thinks he’s GOOD ENOUGH to have covered his butt…. Which makes ne wonder if he was involved with other MISSING PERSON cases?!

      I read a quote from HIM in a recent article admiring to the girlfriend & even kissing her. He said something to the effect of “if kissing another woman other than my wife after 39 years makes me horrible, then I guess I am….”

      This entire thing has smelled BAD since the beginning. He also said she disappeared in a “light rain” in the same article. When in fact it was a HORRIBLE SUMMER THUNDERSTORM! And as someone above mentioned, it was on the eve of the 1st night of VBS, which she LOVED. With the amount of MUD, they would have found a trace of her SOMEWHERE if she walked off that farm.

    • As I read his Facebook posts I noticed a continual pattern of him telling flowery stories about their past while, out the other side of his personality, showing his contempt for her.

  5. Yvonne says:

    Just went back and read the story from July 7th. Yeah, he is guilty and he is tap-dancing all over the place. A “new” note, really?? She sanctioned his new relationship? I hope they find evidence to take him down.

    • As a woman who has been through the court system and numerous counselors, I can verify that many systems still lean toward favoring the male, even when testimony and evidence is overwhelming in favor of the victim. I’m not male bashing…there are many wonderful, godly men; good men, out there, but this has been my experience and the experience of many other women. I pray the police are not being easy on him because of his political connections. It sounds like they suspect him but don’t have a body to collect evidence.

  6. Sounds Familiar says:

    Read his 2/14/15 FB post – It’s very interesting with the new revelations about his extramarital relationship and his descriptions of “true love”. Also, his comments on 11/22/14 about what his expectations of a good wife are. It makes me wonder if Lynn did confront him about something in a way that he felt he could not endure. It’s also struck me how derogatory he has been toward her despite continuing to profess his love. It is as though he cannot hide his disdain even though part of him loves her. This is also typical of an abuser! In my experience with losing close family members, death seems to cause us to sanitize away the bad stuff and focus on the good stuff, but Kerry does not seem capable of that. Even though he knows he needs to play the part of the loving husband, he cannot stop himself from telling everyone how messy she is, what a bad cook she was when they got married and how his mother had to teach her the right way to cook for him, etc. On 11/22/14 He says: “Privacy: Likewise, no man can endure the offense of a wife who violates the secrecy of his private attributes by callously talking of them to others. For whatever reasons women tend to share what men consider ‘way too much information’ about themselves to their fellow lady friends. Husbands eventually discover that their wives talk about things to one another that scare the tar out of them. Virtually every husband has the same reaction. At some point in their marriage they come to realize the depth of sharing their wife has with another wife. Within the next thirty seconds the wife is instantly on the witness stand being questioned about what details have been “shared” about him?
    Again, my Bride has wisely grown to guard herself about what she shares. She knows that her husband is just as fragile as every other ‘he-man’ who thinks they are tough. There are things husbands and wives know that no one should ever be told. The home is a place where virtually every social taboo no longer applies. The home is where we all get to relax and drop all our guards (and dog gone it, everyone has gas – get over it). But you still don’t talk about many things in ways that violate your mate. And the list of such topics can get long. A little discretion affirms a lot of love!”

    • I agree with all that you said. What I caught about his extra marital affair is how he said he consulted with trusted advisors…therefore…putting the responsibility for it on someone else’s shoulders and not taking responsibility for it himself. “There are things husbands and wives know that no one should ever be told. The home is a place where virtually every social taboo no longer applies,” is messed up reasoning. It makes me think he is clueless that abusive behaviors are NOT normal or healthy. I’m glad Lynn found the bravery and time to tell a few friends some of her husband’s behaviors. When a friend comes to us in confidence, and shares details of an abusive nature, we need to listen, take her seriously, and provide help when possible.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Thank you for writing this BLOG!!!

    It’s about time SOMEONE put into writing what MANY women who have had to deal with ABUSE are seeing.

    This is SOO sad to think about the life Lynn Messer LIVED & how it quite possibly came to an end. It breaks my heart! It also drives me to do SOMETHING more for WOMEN who live in these type of Emotional & Psychological ABUSE!!!! Or in nicer terms a VERY UN-HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP with a psychopath that quite possibly thinks He is a KING & she ENJOYS this type of life, b/c she continues to try & please him, in order to KEEP THE PEACE…

  8. Thank you for having the courage to speak out about this subject and to write so eloquently about the abuse women suffer under these circumstances. It’s really much wider and much more prevalent than most people understand and only perpetuated by the unwilling to recognized the affront to women. I could have written this, but you had the bravery to publish it.

    • You’re sweet! Before I hit the, ‘Publish’ button I wondered if I was crazy for taking this on in a public forum. I expected backlash, or at least corrections from friends who happen to like Kerry. I haven’t so far. I’m exhausted for hurting, abused women; especially those with no voice. May we be Lynn’s voice for her. Should it turn out Kerry is not involved, I will apologize, but at the least he has not honored his wife in his bizarre Facebook postings.

  9. Ginny w. says:

    i WAS IN a abusive relasonship for 7 years everyone never knew the hurt i indored the sadness ,the words i will kill you if you leave i was to the point kill me because i am leaving after he chocked me till i almost passed out. sometimes things are hidden very well behind closed doors.

  10. Neighbor says:

    This is a great article. We live close to the Messer family so when this all took place it was very alarming for us, since we didn’t know if she left on her own, or if someone had hurt her. I was all over this entire situation. I followed his every word on Facebook, and after a couple months i had to “un follow” his page for her. It was just to sickening. He referred to her as his “bride”, he never said “Lynn, I Love YOU”, please come home when he was claiming she had psychological issues and likely walked off. He made comments about how his grand children are going to miss her and made references that they will never get to see her again. How does he know that? After all, he was saying she likely walked off (on her bad foot). I don’t like making false accusations, but that mans smells so guilty it sick. There was a roadblock a week or so after she went missing and I had to ask the young deputy if they checked the cistern in that old house. He has no idea what a cistern was and said he would ask. I still wonder if they checked it. I just pray that she is found so her children have closure. 😦
    And now he claims she left a note? He just made that public?

  11. Hi Chocolateorelse,
    Let’s say your goofy ex-husband went missing in the middle of the night when you were married..
    Someone, somewhere finds some fault in your character and claims you killed him for money to buy Hersey Kisses.
    You had no idea and were to what happened.
    Do you deserve to be accused with out evidence?
    Messer may have done it. I don’t know
    Being a cheater or a bad, goofy husband doesn’t make one a murderer.
    Again he very well may be, but until there is proof I would hope people would spare anyone the stigma of these kind of accusations.
    I worked with a man years ago who was accused of being a child molester by an angry ex-wife. I kind of doubted that he was at the time and years passed and he was cleared when the molested victim came forward and stated his his ex-wife concocted the accusations and put her up to lying about the man.
    It didn’t matter, as soon as he was accused he was treated like most people think a child molester should be treated, except he wasn’t one
    He could barely hold a job,suffered terrible harassment and physical abuse at home in his community and at work. I bet there are still folks who hold it against him.
    Watch ” Gone Girl”. I know it’s just a movie but in a relevant, fictional fashion it shows how things are not always how they appear to be.
    I do hope the truth pops up what ever it is.

    • I admit I don’t know what went on in their home, and that I hope his friends are correct; that he isn’t guility. My motive was to throw into the conversation that, if he possibly is a narcissist, it completely changes the dynamics of the investigation. What I have seen and read from him could be taletell signs of deep underlyng issues. Issues the general public have most likely never considered. I hope those close to him will now read up on narcissistic personality disorder. Only those closest to him will know if he is or isn’t. It’s very difficult for doctors to diagnose because these people don’t tell the truth; and even when they do, they can spin any situation to make it look justifiable. As for, “Gone Girl,” I have considered that too; after all it sounds like Lynn had good reason to want away from Kerry, but even if she would do that to her husband, I don’t think she would do that to her children, grandbabies, or God. Time will tell; I hope it will tell soon!

    • anonymous says:

      This commenter sounds like Kerry. Similar writing style. He likes to portray himself as a silly, bumbling man. In fact, I think he’s even used “goofy” to describe himself. Also, there was an article written in the UK back in October 2014 that bizarrely tried to connect Lynn’s case to “Gone Girl”. I thought at the time that Kerry probably planted that to continue to make Lynn the crazy one. Looking back he has carefully constructed this caricature of his wife…this zany, energetic, dedicated wife who just may have walked 9 miles to the river. All this while secretly planting ideas that maybe she framed her husband! Sick! The truth will come out.

      • I’m not Kerry.
        I don’t feel I’m goofy or bumbling.
        Kerry, from what I know of him is guilty of being “Goofy”.
        What I am trying to say is without proof people shouldn’t condemn the man as a murderer, just in the event he may not be.
        I don’t know one way or the other, but I would hate to be accused of something I didn’t do for no other reason than people who didn’t know thought so.
        You may very well be right. What if you aren’t?

        In 2007 Sally Clark died of alcohol poisoning after not being able to recover from the horrors and false accusations of her conviction and imprisonment. Psychiatric issues like alcohol dependency syndrome stemmed from the alleged murders of her 2 sons, one in 1996 and the other in 1998. In January 2003 her convictions were all overturned stating the deaths were of natural causes and that evidence had been tampered with.
        The case of Sally Clark was not the only one of its kind. There were several and one of the worse is Angela Cannings’ ordeal. After her sons’ deaths in 1991 and 1999 and serving her sentence for a year, the results of further investigation revealed that her family had a significant history of sudden death syndrome. In 2003 her conviction was overturned but her family was already split apart and a prison inmate continued harassing her.

        Here is one more that people will be more familiar with.
        Suspected as the main culprit in the bombing of the Olympic games in Atlanta, Richard Jewell was paid back for his vigilance in forwarding to the police a package which he thought was suspicious. A little while later, it blew up the venue and fingers pointed at him for killing one and injuring hundreds. Even though he wasn’t really convicted, the fact that his reputation was tarnished and he was “villainized” because of the whole ordeal was bad enough.

        There are hundreds of examples.
        I’m not sticking up for anyone, I’m just thinking until there is proof maybe folks should hold off until there is more than “He was goofy and a bad husband.” That only makes him guilty of being goofy and a bad husband.
        I do hope this gets figured out

  12. Michal Ward King says:

    I have been very drawn to Lynn since I read of her disappearance on Dateline.
    I have read any article, I could find.
    I researched Kerry’s “Find Lynn Messer” facebook page.
    Does it sound like a challenge to anyone else but me?
    I was appalled at, what he probably conceived as slight put downs, of the woman he claimed to love.
    I didn’t believe his story for a second.
    In his April 10th “My Rock” post, it sounds like he is offering clues to where she may be buried…to me, that is.
    I don’t believe Lynn killed herself and hid her own body.
    I don’t believe she took an 8 mile walk in the dark with a broken toe and vanished.
    I believe Kerry killed her and disposed of her body.
    I have no proof and don’t try to offer any but it is what, I believe.
    My heart breaks for Lynn and for her sons, daughter in law and grandchildren. I pray for you.
    I believe she was a beautiful, unique, strong, loving woman.
    I believe she is with the Father that she loved and served.
    I believe He has her safely in the shelter of His wings, never to be hurt again.
    I believe she is happy and her smile as bright as the sun.
    I believe she deserves Justice…may God grant her that for the life she served Him.

    • I still have in my possession cards and letters written by my former husband ( I have held on to everything for investigators through the years and now for a memoir I’m writing.) who had a thing for writing about water, lakes, rivers, ponds, rain and the words, “Big Wet”. They were always written to a child; even after a judge and his psychiatrist told him to stop it; he continued. Everyone suspected about the reasoning behind the words. Everyone suspected they were his clues as to what he was doing…which was illegal. If Lynn’s husband if guilty, I can agree with you that the possibility exists the April 10th post is full of clues. For some people it is a thrill to leave clues. They believe they are brilliant for getting by with what they did; while at the same time leaving clues to see if anyone can match their brilliance. For some; they know what they did was wrong and they want someone to catch them and put a stop to them. Either way it’s a sick game; for sure! Thank you for sharing about, Lynn. I too pray for justice. May it come quickly!

  13. Michal Ward King says:

    Thank you for this post and for your courage.
    I am sorry for all your suffering.
    I rejoice that you made it out alive.


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